Familia 3-13: How hangdog can one guy get?

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Pancho has the same look of aggrieved culpability through the whole first 40 minutes (which is the amount I, Melinama, blogged for Ezra). Here's my contribution:

Pina: amazed to be invited to Candy's wedding. Think: the cause of our divorce, that slut, is marrying a gangster! Veens tries to get her to feel sorry, but she can't manage it. She's looking forward to wearing a spectacular "outfit" to the wedding.

Lidia: wrapped in gray saran wrap. Kisses Enzo at work.

The little guy who's always looking for Arnold is - still looking for Arnold.

Candy tells Chela: I'm pretending to be happy and won over - I'm using my charms to lull Napoleon - but then - uh, no plan yet.

Pancho, who was the stupidest slowest runner-to-the-airport ever, sobs on the sidewalk. He at least realizes it's all his fault. Chacho agrees. And then, he hurt Chela...

Chela begs Napoleon to treat Candy well. No problem, he rumbles in his manly basso: since he's planning to have her bear many of his children, he will treat her like a queen. Chela leaves with all Candy's greetings for the family. Napoleon smugly tells his bride he's invited all los Irabien (including el nenenenene and the dog) to the wedding.

Lidia has a new apartment where she and Enzo can spend a lot of time together, especially the nights. He's absolutely into it, no doubt. They try it out right away.

Chela comes home, everybody is staring at her pityingly. Then they say blah blah we love you, count on us. Boo-hoo.

... and NOW, after 20 minutes of the show, we have the opening credits? Univision is so confused!

Chacho says La Burro decided not to start to punish Pancho for playing with people's feelings. As proof, now it starts just fine, proving that it's on Chela's side.

The little guy looking for Arnold finally finds him and won't let him ooze away. Arnold says he isn't gay. The little guy is not impactado. "You promised long ago you'd go out with me [in return for doing some creepy thing, I've forgotten what) and now you have to come through." No matter how low Arnold makes his voice, the guy won't let him off the, uh, hook. 8 pm, my house, it's a date!

Pancho comes home to a very chilly reception. All the kids want an explanation for his bad behavior. His explanations sound very lame even to him. Not only has he broken Chela's heart, he wrecked her chances with Enzo. Back against the wall, Pancho has the gall to blame all of them - because they pushed him so hard into Chela's arms.

Karin comes to see Pina at work. Pina invites this genetically approved blonde-and-blue-eyed high-social-status candidate for Freddy to come to dinner, dressed like a princess in designer duds. Arnold checks out her butt on the way out.

Vince is a wreck, yells at Enzo and tells about the upcoming wedding. All Enzo can say is, don't mess with this gangster. Forget Candy! Besides, you seem to be doing awfully well with your actual wife (ex-wife) Pina. What's up with that? Vince whines: Routine killed his marriage. Now that it isn't routine, he's interested.

Napoleon chose and bought Candy's wedding dress without even measuring her. He knows she's not that into him but doesn't seem to mind. He woos her with servants and fine things and after a long list of wonderful stuff he'll give Candy, she seems genuinely enthused and gives him a real kiss! Or was it?

There's something going on with some middle-aged secretary but I haven't grasped it. Oh, she lost the money for some party or something.

Over to you, Ezra!

Napoleon looks like someone you'd see sitting on a park bench feeding birds, not a genuine gangster type. Anyway, he catches Candi calling Vins and threatens to kill him.

Chela is disconsolate, she doesn't know what she'll do... But then she gets an idea: "I will go and sell Avon products." That'll cheer her up.

Pancho and Chacho have a little chat, but Chacho goes off to see Sandrucha, leaving Pancho alone in Rebe's office to kiss her chair and continue the evening's moping. Then he changes scene and sits in la Burra, moping and sobbing ... Chela wanders by on her way to try crawling back to Enzo. Enzo, however, is already making out with Mike's assistant. Chela's response is predictable.

Pancho is a baby about the needle for the blood test to see if Fers is his mom. (This time the samples will be sent to the United States.) Later, he regales Doc Oc with tales of his childhood, including some info about his dad, who died of autoimmune disorder.

Now, after a little obnoxious bit with Temo and two girls pledging eternal friendship, we get more of Pancho's moping. He takes out a framed picture of him and Rebeka in bed, and my mom wondered who took the picture. A good question.

Arnold still has his little problem with Raymundo. He's bugging Pina about it. I'm still amused that everyone on this show has the same ringtone.

Arnold runs into... the woman who fired him! They have a little tiff with those two and Ray, where she yells "he can't be yours, because he's NOT GAY!" Nonetheless, nothing really comes out of this encounter. She has a well-engineered brassiere. You have to have an MIT PhD to design those things.

Pina tries yet again to break up Ana and Fred with a petty scheme - she has Karen come and surprise-smooch Fred while Ana looks on. Ana falls for it a second time! Then reluctantly accepts Fred's explanation that it was just his manipulative mother. Still, she storms off a bit grumpy. Vins comes home to a huge fight, self-administers a dose of whiskey, and attempts to mediate. Fred accuses Pina of acting like a Novela villainess. lol.

Big surpri! Rebe didn't go to Miami, as she tells Fers. She had a moment of complete lucidity, and realized that she couldn't do it. She couldn't do it because it would be betraying herself, not because she loves Pancho but because she doesn't love Mike. She still hates Pancho, but she's going back to work at Avon. Phew, I bet the crew for the show is glad to not have to haul out the Miami set.